| As the engine roar melted to a kitten purr | | | | and I adjourned to our secluded patch of |
| and our boat nuzzled up to the Caye Caulker | | | | waterfront paradise, soaked up the afternoon |
| pier, we did a quick inventory check. Dancing | | | | sun, and flipped through back issues of |
| palms, tick. Sun bleached beach, tick. Island | | | | Mexican celebrity gossip magazines found |
| motto, "Go Slow", painted lazily on a | | | | discarded in our room - anything to keep our |
| signpost stuck in the sand, tick. I gave my | | | | minds off the fact that our days of sloth |
| partner in crime a private smile. This was | | | | were numbered. Back at the bungalow we |
| the place. We'd escaped...for now.Bobbing up | | | | hatched our plan. We were not giving up our |
| and down against a tiny Belizean island on | | | | life of leisure that easily. We would go down |
| the Caribbean Sea wasn't in the original | | | | partying. Caye Ambergris awaited and I had a |
| script. The plan had been to fly into Belize | | | | birthday to celebrate.As the largest, most |
| for a quick taste of eco-adventure before | | | | developed, and most expensive of the Belizean |
| slipping over the Guatemalan border. But we'd | | | | islands, Caye Ambergris caters well for the |
| got greedy, and four days later, we were | | | | first class holiday seeker, with a range of |
| still there with our hands caught in the | | | | villas, luxury home stays and resorts to |
| action jar. Jungle hikes, eco-tours, Jaguar | | | | choose from. To prepare for our last stand, |
| spotting, cave tubing, Mayan ruins and | | | | we checked into the mysteriously named Sun |
| mountain bike treks. Where would it end? The | | | | Breeze Beach Hotel, close to the main town of |
| equatorial heat was on. We'd needed a place | | | | San Pedro, for some pampering and creature |
| to lay low for a couple of days. Somewhere a | | | | comforts. The spacious rooms, resort style |
| man could find a secluded beach and lie back | | | | swimming pool, Jacuzzi, massage studio, |
| and think of England, or anywhere else he'd | | | | swanky outdoor bar, and international |
| rather not be. After making a few discreet | | | | flavoured restaurant were a world away from |
| inquiries we knew there was only one place to | | | | the Gilliganism's of Caye Caulker, but at |
| hide, and only one man powerful enough to | | | | only USD125 a night, my inner Thurston Howell |
| help us get there. The man known only as, | | | | the third was calling.Pandered, pleasured, |
| "The Marine Terminal ticket booth guy".So we | | | | and fed in ways that only money can buy, we |
| paid for our boat passes in small, unmarked | | | | climbed to the lookout over the hotel bar. |
| bills, jumped aboard the first vessel bound | | | | Slipping in the hammock, we witnessed one of |
| for the islands, and left the spoils of | | | | the most beautiful sunsets the Caribbean has |
| mainland adventure in our wake. Not that the | | | | to offer. Swinging back and forth with a |
| warm blue coastal waters were fooling us. | | | | birthday cocktail in hand, I could truly |
| Home to more than one hundred and seventy | | | | appreciate how delightfully far we were from |
| islands, or cayes, and the world's second | | | | anything resembling an office cubicle. |
| largest barrier reef, it wouldn't be easy to | | | | Contemplation over, I made my final charge |
| keep our hands off a bounty of aquatic fun | | | | into the night. Crazy Canucks Bar, crazy |
| that has tempted travellers since Blackbeard | | | | Canadian in tow, we drank, laughed and danced |
| and his Buccaneer posse cruised these waters | | | | embarrassingly to reggae music until |
| back in the 1600's. Yet, as we stood on this | | | | sunrise.The following days we gorged on water |
| unassuming wharf and watched our getaway | | | | sports as fast as Caye Ambergris could dish |
| vessel pull out of dock, the captain turned | | | | them up. There was diving amongst some of the |
| to us with some re-assuring words of advice, | | | | world's most beautiful coral reefs, sailing |
| "Relax mon. You're on Caye Caulker time | | | | tours around the island, deep-sea fishing for |
| now".If Gilligan had ever taken up real | | | | sailfish and barracuda, jet skiing and |
| estate development, Caye Caulker town would | | | | paragliding off the sun-tickled beaches. Oh |
| have been his Big Apple. Dozing peacefully on | | | | how we feasted!Our hunger for aqua adventure |
| this slip of an island, the cluster of | | | | finally satiated, we wandered into town, |
| brightly painted ramshackle beach hideaways, | | | | plonked our behinds on the nearest bikes for |
| deserted beach lots, scattered fishing boats, | | | | rent, and peddled to the far reaches of the |
| palm trees, sand floor restaurants, dive | | | | island. Crossing a small river by |
| huts, and salty old sailors propping up bars | | | | man-pulling-rope-very-hard-powered ferry to |
| at 11am in the morning, makes for the perfect | | | | the less populated north island, we cycled |
| getaway haven.The jewels in Caye Caulker's | | | | along remote dirt tracks lined with sweeping |
| crown are it minimalist pleasures. No | | | | palm trees. Emerging from the bush onto the |
| international resorts, flashy nightclubs, or | | | | beach at the edge of the lapping blue |
| peak hour traffic. Remember the motto? Go | | | | Caribbean, it was a leisurely ride along long |
| slow. Our mission, and yes we did choose to | | | | stretches of white squeaky sand to the |
| accept it, was to find a bungalow for as | | | | "money" end of town.The north beach plays |
| little as forty dollars per night on a quiet | | | | host to luxurious resort bungalows and |
| stretch of squeaky white sand, treat our | | | | private beach villas. I pondered ambitiously |
| palates to an array of seafood delights, and | | | | over the For Sale sign standing outside one |
| then debrief over a drink at a beach bar | | | | particularly hedonistic abode. Apparently, |
| watching the sun slip beneath a sheet of | | | | the former owner wasn't happy about motoring |
| Caribbean blue sea. This message will | | | | his 80ft cruiser around all that coral |
| self-indulge in five seconds.Before long, | | | | nonsense to moor outside his beach palace. |
| we'd slipped into the "no shoes, no shirt, no | | | | Being the entrepreneurial type, he'd used a |
| problem" and "sarong, swimsuit, smile" dress | | | | few sticks of dynamite to blast a neat little |
| code, and immersed ourselves amongst the | | | | driveway straight through the reef. |
| welcoming band of eclectic castaways. It soon | | | | Unfortunately, the government didn't see it |
| became clear that the local brew of Creoles, | | | | that way and sent him a fine big enough to |
| Central Americans, and Europeans posed little | | | | clear the Belize national debt. He was last |
| threat to our relaxation plans. However, we'd | | | | seen paddling a canoe in the direction of |
| have to keep tabs on the North American | | | | Cuba.A little further along we stumbled |
| retirees swerving along the streets in | | | | across Captain Morgan's Retreat, setting of |
| rickety old golf carts, sending dogs, | | | | the original Temptation Island show. As we |
| children and loitering tourists running for | | | | stood outside the Mecca of televised drama, |
| cover.For three perfect days we hid behind | | | | so many touching memories came flooding back. |
| sunglasses, cocktail umbrellas and lobster | | | | Amber and Troy whispering under a palm tree, |
| menus, wondering if maybe, just maybe, there | | | | probably discussing the effects of global |
| would be no more calls to action, and life | | | | warming. Shawana ditching Gary and confessing |
| really was a beach after all. Then one night, | | | | to Chad 'you had me at "are those things |
| whilst minding our own business over a couple | | | | real?"' At that moment, I couldn't help but |
| of tall Panty Rippers at Popeye's Bar and | | | | appreciate the truly important things in |
| Restaurant, the bartender told us a man had | | | | life. I turned to the ski bunny and told her |
| been in asking questions. "Did he know anyone | | | | she had a smile so beautiful it could almost |
| who might like to explore the reef?" "Had he | | | | pass as cosmetically enhanced.Peddling across |
| seen any tourists dance so badly to the | | | | the beach towards town for the last time |
| reggae band they couldn't possibly show their | | | | before heading back to the mainland, we waved |
| faces around the island?" The next morning, | | | | goodbye to all the things we loved about the |
| we went to see a man about a snorkelling | | | | cayes. The lazy palm trees, the ivory white |
| tour.Whilst experienced divers prefer the | | | | sands, the aqua blue waters, the hammocks |
| more exciting sites in the waters off Caye | | | | swinging in the breeze, the friendly faces, |
| Ambergris, the beautiful calm reefs of Caye | | | | the plastic whale and dolphin fountain |
| Caulker offered the ideal setting for first | | | | splashing water over Jesus outside the pink |
| timer submariners like my nervous companion, | | | | Jehovah's Witness mansion...the what? Anyway, |
| a Canadian mountain girl, much more at ease | | | | for a couple of repeat adventure travel |
| in a set of ski's than a pair of | | | | offenders, it sure made a nice place for a |
| flippers.After the initial disappointment of | | | | day pass or two.Some have said I spend too |
| learning that this wasn't my chance to wear a | | | | much time living in a fantasy world, that I |
| tight rubber body suit in public, the reef | | | | need to get a grip on reality. Sometimes I |
| snorkelling trip turned out to be a fantastic | | | | think they're right. But then again, they've |
| experience. We goggled and gawked at the | | | | probably never been to the Belizean |
| amazing array of fish, eels, and spectacular | | | | cayes.Simon Hillier is a freelance writer |
| coral formations. The highlight of the | | | | based in Sydney, Australia. His company, Get |
| three-hour tour was Shark Ray Alley, where | | | | There Writing Services, provides copywriting, |
| Nurse sharks circled our wary group from a | | | | travel writing, feature articles, scripts and |
| distance before weaving in for a closer look, | | | | ebooks that will have your readers clicking |
| and the Southern Ray stingrays slid their | | | | and streaming for more. For further |
| expansive wings over our bodies. Both proved | | | | information on Simon's article services, |
| to be fairly harmless, if perhaps a little | | | | visit the feature articles and travel writing |
| fresh for a first date.For the rest of the | | | | section of the Get There Writing Services |
| day hardly a word was spoken. Mountain girl | | | | website. |